Statistics show that more people are renting than buying homes. Mostly because buying a home has become the same as renting. In both cases someone else ends up owning the house.
U.S. Savings Bonds are going paperless, only being sold online. With the U.S. $15 Trillion in debt, apparently the bonds are worth about the same as anything that can be printed off of Groupon.
A report says that half of Americans qualify as the world’s richest 1%, making at least $34,000 a year. That’s why all those soldiers making less than $34,000 a year were involved in Occupy Iraq and Occupy Afghanistan.
A report says that half of Americans qualify as the world’s richest 1%, making at least $34,000 a year. Even though they are part of the 1%, they are still just trying to occupy their home.
New York Governor Andrew Cuomo is calling for mandatory DNA samples from criminals. Ironically, his predecessor Eliot Spitzer got in trouble because he was caught donating his DNA.
A study says that dogs know what people are thinking from their facial expressions. Like the look that only comes upon discovering a pair of shredded $200 Nikes means “We’re going for a long car ride.”
A Wisconsin man was arrested after taking a 150 mile test drive in a 2000 Nissan. Apparently he just wanted to be sure the car was in good enough shape to get him all the way out of Wisconsin.
200 Houston high school seniors were caught cheating on an exam. School officials became suspicious when they found that 200 students actually passed the test.
President Obama says the U.S. will remain as the world’s top military power. That’s why he’s getting us out of the Middle East. It’s tough to call yourself #1 when losing two wars at the same time.
A New York judge has ruled some Clorox kitty litter ads are false and need to be pulled. Apparently justice is blind but it can still smell.
The White House has announced a summer jobs initiative. Although right now the people in the White House are more concerned about having a job after autumn.
Tiger Woods’ ex-wife Elin Nordegren demolished a $12 Million mansion in Florida in order to rebuild on the property. How hard can it be to tear down a house when you’ve already taken down a billion operation with a few swings with a 9 iron?
Clay Aiken says after working with both, he respects Donald Trump more than Simon Cowell. And having to suck up to both of them means he has no respect for himself.
A study says that men and women have large differences in their personalities, with men being more dominant and women being more sensitive. Apparently the study didn’t include Rosie O’Donnell or Richard Simmons.
Vint Cerf, who is considered by many to be the Father of the Internet says web access isn’t a human right. To which AOL says that’s what they’ve been telling their customers for years.
The Hawaiian volcano Kilauea has entered its 30th continuous year of eruption. That still isn’t close to the record currently held by Bobby Knight.
Researchers have created a jumpsuit that shows what it feels like to be 75. One thing that makes the person feel like they are 75 is wearing a jumpsuit.
Defense Secretary Leon Panetta says that cyber warfare could paralyze the U.S. Apparently we are completely vulnerable once they take away our access to Angry Birds and Internet porn.
The Pentagon says it wants a leaner military. Apparently their plan will start with smaller rations for MREs.
Credit card interest rates are at a four year high, averaging 15.14%. Apparently that’s how MasterCard got its name, from having so many people locked in as indentured servants.
Apartment rental rates are increasing for the third straight year. Apparently it costs more to have the status symbol of not having to live in your car anymore.
The IRS audited one out of every eight millionaires last year. They let the other seven go because they were all former billionaires.
The government says it will start regulating hand and face transplants. Is there a problem with unqualified people performing those surgeries? Apparently they want to put an end to all those back alley hand and face transplanters.
Worldwide illegal drug use is estimated to be up to 200 Million people a year. Otherwise known as people who don’t have a prescription insurance plan.
A study says that driving with a cold or the flu is as dangerous as being drunk. That means you could get hauled in for blowing mucus into the breathalyzer.
A study says that age related memory loss can happen as early as in the 40s. Mostly all the people on Match.com who seem to have forgotten ten years off their age.
A “matured” Snooki says she has cut back on her drinking. Apparently it is just too hard to land a good punch when you are seeing three opponents.
Jenny McCarthy says that “Dancing With The Stars” needs some A-List celebrities. For one thing, then it could really be called “Dancing With The Stars”.
Jenny McCarthy says that “Dancing With The Stars” needs some A-List celebrities. In other words, they need to stop asking people like Jenny McCarthy to be contestants.
Friends say that Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger are not reconciling. Mostly because Arnold will never be able to pronounce “reconciling”.
That’s it for now, Oh Faithful Readers! We are heading into the first full weekend of the New Year! Aren’t you sick of all the “year’s firsts”? How about the first joke that is actually funny? Still working on it. All you need to do is make sure to keep sending the love!
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